turn down the game volume/music a bit and turn up your own volume a bit.
Focus on entertaining more rather than just talking about nothing.
If you find that you have huge gaps of not talking or you're not talking about anything important, try to cut it out. You don't the video to be too short, obviously, but you also don't want to be boring.
Along with what I just said, don't talk about yourself or the comments that much, you constantly are referring to your bad equipment or what the comments will be saying which is not good. Again, try more to focus on entertaining and talking about the actual game.
To end things off, think about this, what sets you apart from other people posting the same content? Try doing something that separates you from others.