Some of the edits were awesome. I don't know about the green screen. Can you not just use the current frame instead of the green screen? My opinion anyways. Too much of the glitch also seems like it could be annoying so not sure if this is just a snip of your video, but if there is a lot of that then I would back off a bit. If you are still trying to stick with the suspenseful nature then maybe more slow motion could be your friend. I am by no means an expert, but I have watched enough montages to at least be an above average viewer.